"The woods are lovely, dark and deep, but I have promises to keep, and miles to go before I sleep, and miles to go before I sleep."

Tuesday, February 27, 2007

Headline News

Muddling through life in this day and age is, if nothing else, mindlessly interesting.

If it’s not Britney’s recent tirade and her subsequent 45 minute stint in rehab or Hollywood’s extravagant hypocrisy that fills our nation’s media outlets, it’s the ongoing debate as to when and where the latest celebrity victim of their own bad decisions will ultimately be laid to rest; all this along with a daily play by play rate of bodily decomposition.

(As of this writing, James Brown currently holds the lead over Anna Nicole Smith in the Not Yet in the Ground category however she’s leaving him in the dust (so to speak) when it comes to returning to dust.)

Add to this the following selected top stories:

218-pound 8-year-old subject of neglect case

Granted, a 218 pound 8 year old is pretty frightening but why are we so surprised? We live in a world where fast food has become as much a part of our culture as neglecting to vote. For years and years we’ve been encouraged to drive thru and have it our way. And far too often, our way involves, “two all beef patties, special sauce (Special? In what way), lettuce, cheese, pickles and onions on a sesame seed bun."

And even though the major fast food chains have recently begun touting their “healthy choice” menus, isn’t it really just too Mc-little too Mc-late?

Mom admits coaching kids to fake retardation

Now here’s a nominee for Mother of the Year.

Rosie Costello admitted to collecting more than $280,000 in benefits from Social Security and state social service agencies by teaching her children to behave as if they were mentally retarded. She began this educational process when her daughter was but 4 years old.

Her now 26 year old son, a fast learner who apparently fooled Social Security officials by “picking at his face, slouching and appearing uncommunicative”, continued his ruse well into his mid-20’s but was ultimately found out when Social Security workers uncovered a video of him “ably contesting a traffic ticket.”

Sharp bunch, those Social Security officials.

There are I think, several interesting aspects to this story.

The most obvious is the amount of thought, effort and energy some will expend to acquire monetary gain through deception while not even considering devoting any portion of their abilities to earning their keep legitimately. In addition, it occurs to me if the scam was so convincingly portrayed so as to successfully bilk the government out of this much money, why did not red flags arise when he obtained a driver’s license? And finally, did they fool everyone; their families, teachers, neighbors and pets alike. (Dogs are difficult to fool you know)

The daughter is said to be still on the lam, or maybe lost, or confused, or suffering from amnesia. Pick one.

Fighting surgeons leave patient in the lurch

A routine appendix operation in a Belgrade hospital turned out to be anything but routine when two surgeons went fist city during the procedure.

It seems an aggressive ear pull by one of the doctors led to a retaliatory face slap from the other. This then escalated into a full fledged fight resulting in an assortment of bruises, a split lip, loose teeth, a fractured finger and a trip to the hospital administrator’s office where the words, “He started it!” echoed throughout the hallway.

Both sets of parents were summoned to the administrator’s office for a conference.

Although no reasons were cited for the altercation, it is rumored to have resulted from a disagreement over who has been using whose tongue depressors.

The heavily sedated patient remained none the wiser and his procedure was successfully completed by the attending assistant doctor who was by all accounts, way more mature.

1 comment:

Fe-lady said...

I am sure that if we dug far enough we would find "blame" somewhere...probably a school or a teacher...
thank goodness for triathletes/bloggers who at least SAY they are responsible and helping out others truly in need! (But I bet 99.9% of them are telling the truth!)